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James "Jay"
Alexander Nitsos
Nov 5, 1963 — Nov 2, 2023
James (Jay) Alexander Nitsos, 59, of Hilton Head Island, South Carolina, passed away on November 2, 2023, after a sudden illness.
Jay was born in Smithtown, New York on November 5, 1963, to Fethon (Fred) and Dorothy (Dot) Nitsos. He graduated from Ridgefield, Conn., High School in 1981, then completed a Bachelor of Science in Math at the University of Connecticut in 1986 and a Master of Business Administration at Elon University in 2001. He pursued a career in finance, retiring from United Healthcare as Vice President of Health Care Economics in April 2022.
Sports were Jay's first love, and by high school he excelled at baseball and basketball. He also mastered tennis and golf, pool and ping pong.He loved a spirited round of golf with his son, Jason; bicycling on the beach with his daughter, Alexandra; and simply enjoying the marsh side oasis he created with his wife of 33 years, Wendy. He was a loyal fan of the Chicago Cubs and the University of Connecticut Huskies. He named his Australian Shepherd mix Kemba for UConn basketball star, Kemba Walker.
Jay was deeply loved by his family, friends, teammates, co-workers, neighbors, and anyone who had the good fortune to meet him. He carried himself with a quiet charisma that exuded, more than anything, humility and selflessness. He enjoyed crossword puzzles, doing Wordle with Wendy over morning coffee, and tossing a tennis ball with Kemba on Tower Beach. He also readily shared his infectious laugh and appreciated a lively party, especially with his older brother, Mark; they were as close as brothers can be. Jay's gin-and-tonics and Bloody Marys were known for being stiff and tasty. His omelettes were legendary.
When his parents moved the family to Ridgefield in 1972, Jay and sister, Donna, went for a bike ride to explore their new neighborhood. Upon Donna falling and hurting herself, nine-year-old Jay went door-to-door looking to strangers for help. On another bike ride with sister, Pam, Jay found a wad of twelve one-dollar bills on the sidewalk. He gave Pam eight and kept only four for himself. He'd get down on his knees to play football with younger sister, Amy.
You wouldn't catch him bragging, but one of his favorite topics was his children. They tested him from time to time, but Jay's unconditional love never wavered. He helped Alexandra move into at least three different cities and drove her car across the country for an upcoming work assignment when she couldn't manage it. He traveled far and wide to make sure he never missed a soccer match of Jason's. He remained level-headed in the occasional crisis (except, perhaps, a Cubs losing streak, as documented in scores of texts he and brother Mark sent to sister Pam). He deplored poor sportsmanship and arrogance.He was generous in giving to all whose lives he touched, and his final act of service was as an organ donor, offering the gift of life to others.
Jay is survived by his beloved wife Wendy, daughter Alexandra and son Jason; brother Mark Nitsos (Pattie) and sisters Pam Gruley (Bryan), Laura Nitsos (Tracy Peterson), Donna Ellison (Mike) and Amy Cerruti (Todd); many cousins, nieces, nephews, and other family; countless friends; and Kemba.
In lieu of flowers, memorial donations may be given to Good Sports https://www.goodsports.org or Hilton Head Audubon https://hiltonheadaudubon.org/donate .
Memorial services will be held at Summerfield Farms on Sunday, November 19, at 3:00 PM. We ask for only close friends and family at the service due to size limit at the venue. We thank everyone for their support.
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